I'm 20 and inexperienced with girls

Anonymous
Mar 20, 2013

Q: I am a 20-year-old guy who is in good shape and good looking, however I am still 100% inexperienced with girls. By inexperienced I mean I haven't kissed, taken a girl on a date, intimately touched, had sex, or even seen a girl naked. Lame, I know. The farthest I have ever gone with a girl is a hug. The reason being is that I am shy and nervous when it comes to talking to girls. I have a good personality and a big heart. I am worried that girls will be turned off by a guy who is 20 and has zero experience and will have to "teach" me how to be in a relationship. Every time when I try to talk to a girl for just one minute I blush furiously and stutter and also get butterflies in my stomach. I just feel pathetic compared to all my friends who have so much experience with girls. They have done everything you can think of and I haven't even started yet. The advice they had given me is to go see a prostitute, but I believe that sex is something very special and should only be with the person you love. I'm starting to feel unwanted by girls, but I know I would be an awesome boyfriend. It really hurts me especially at night when I'm trying to fall asleep knowing I have nobody to cuddle with and share my life with. I am really starting to lose hope. I feel very unusual at my age for not having any experience and it’s making me depressed.

A: There is no shame in being inexperienced. Everyone is a virgin at some point in their life! Right now stop concentrating on the intimate details and get out there and simply date a few girls. I believe you’re so concerned that if a girl finds out about your “sexual status” she will instantly be turned off. Well, of course your experience, or lack thereof, isn’t first-date-conversation material. Like you said, you’re a good-looking guy who takes care of himself. If you just act normal, be confident, and allow that schoolboy charm to shine through, there is no reason you shouldn’t be able to land a date with a girl you like that leads to a second, and then a third, and so on. Once you find someone you mutually connect with, the beginning stages, such as the first kiss, become a natural process. And if you’re not sure, it’s certainly O.K. to ask! After you get to know each other a bit and find yourself in an intimate situation, just be honest. If she’s genuine and truly likes you for the person you are, she should be more than willing to school you. As far as your friends and their “advice,” I suppose it’s always an option if you’re a desperate, anti-social simpleton whose only hope of an intimate future lies on the computer in his mother’s basement-apartment. You’re not that guy. Make your experiences everything you want them to be, naturally.

Comments

The Bizness

He should get pregnant....

Colonel Angus

He should get a prostitute pregnant.

deertracker

Is this young man gay? Human nature being what it is, if you are as good looking and all as you say, girls are more than willing to approach you these days. Girls these days enjoy taming an inexperienced guy so don't allow your fear of inexperience get in the way. Kick back relax and just be yourself. Remember you are only 20 and everything that glitters is NOT gold!

Perkins2060

Say hello to Rosey Palmer.

Colonel Angus

I think he'd rather say hola to Jose Palmer

Informed

Anonymous, you are not alone. My daughter is in a similar situation and is starting to feel uncomfortable about it. She is a great girl, pretty, kind, smart, fun, has male friends, but can never seem to find someone she is interested in dating who is also interested in her. She is not interested in "hooking up" or other casual sex and it seems that is what most guys her age are looking for. Hang in there! There are nice girls out there who are in the same boat. And my daughter has friends in the same boat.

Katelih-Trailer...

Perhaps he and your daughter could become friends. They both seem like a breath of fresh air.

Perkins2060

Hook them up!

starryeyes83

Absolutely..... does anybody else thinks that's sweet.....I do. So he's a bit of a late bloomer... so what?

He'll be a great catch for a lucky woman someday.

Good 2 B Me

I agree. What is wrong with someone being a virgin. Too many rush into Sex and jsut end up with a baby in a broken home. Take your time and find the right person. Nothing wrong with that!

Hoss McGee

Moderators have removed this comment because it contained Off-topic comments.

Perkins2060

LOL!

Katelih-Trailer...

LOL...or into a Fleshlight!

The Bizness

You can wash those in the dish washer right?

Colonel Angus

Moderators have removed this comment because it contained Off-topic comments.

Katelih-Trailer...

The Bizness...Honestly, I don't have one of those things, so I have no idea. I am seriously thinking of getting one, though. I think it would be very satisfying and would improve my life a great deal. So, what do ya think..Kenmore or Whirlpool ??????

Hoss McGee

Be the best 0.1 second of his life!

rjk1915

Don't be impatient. I know someone who started the same way and has wound up at age 97 after a good life, he says.

luvblues2

Look online and read some books at the library, dude. You won't be a disappointment the first time if you have studied. Just put the lady ahead of yourself and you should be fine.