BLOG: Poking Fun Of The Perkins Sunshine Case

Bryan Dubois
Dec 11, 2010


A disclaimer for all stories labeled with the Sandusky Regurgitator logo:  They're satire. 

Satire can be misinterpreted and sometimes not understood - which unfortunately for me - is most likely the fault of the writer.

I make it a point to at least have a point when I spend time writing.  The point was that there is always two sides to every story.  In this particular story, SR readers can either cheer on the rookie reporter who is fearlessly standing up to the ruthless Perkins township trustees (who dared to have a 5 minute executive session meeting without notifying The Most Important Person At The Meeting who may or may not have shown up late!) or in the alternative, slam the trustees for technically violating the Sunshine law.  With satire, you can do both.

In Regurgitator-speak:  The trustees were caught at Toys R Us.  So what?  They weren't trying to carry out some malevolent plan, they were simply caught together in public looking for Christmas gifts.  For those who realize that this was only a technical violation, we all must acknowledge that technical violations create acceptance for violations in general, hence: The trustees were caught with their hands in the technical cookie jar.

Out of the 13 comments on that last article, I'm most grateful for this one - which tells me that there is somebody out there who gets it:

I see the grass on both sides of the fence, but unfortunately, in today's world, you must pick sides without acknowledging that both sides have patches of brown here and there.  Nobody's grass is perfect.

As an observer, the evolution of Ouriel's relationship with the trustees will be interesting to watch.  Will it devolve into a tit-for-tat relationship producing an endless supply of "gotcha" stories that essentially have no real point other than to prove that the SR is the press and you should fear them?  (That'll be productive!)  We'll wait and see, because that's all we can do. 

And yes, (IMO) the trustees were wrong. 


Attention all loons who squander their precious time on disruptive commenting:  Screen names meant to impersonate me will be deleted, so don't bother going through the trouble.  You might post a comment or two, but they'll be deleted as well. Your world shouldn't revolved around me, after all I'm just some inconsequential, uneducated manual laborer who writes on the internet.  Seriously.


SR watcher

Bryan Dubois stated:  "...after all I'm just some inconsequential, uneducated manual laborer who writes on the internet."

Finally, an accurate statement and to the point.

When I want to read well-written satirical pieces, I go to

Re: "And yes, the trustees were wrong"   That should have been: “IMO, the trustees were wrong.”

 SR WATCHER, Ok we get it, Dubois isn't the Onion, but guess what you are getting the free content of a smalltown paper, this isn't the Times or Herald and the paper is like a minor league baseball team, young prospects, old lingerers and a shabby mascot- which in this case is Dubois. But what makes you so great, what have you achieved in the literary world that you get to come on here and  declare your pompous disdain towards someone who is at least trying. Just tell us why your opinion should matter if you want to put down someone who is at least trying.


Moderators have removed this comment because it contained obscenity. Discussion Guidelines


 Hey Watcher when you go to the Perkins High school Musical do you feel like sherlock Holmes when you declare "You Kids ain't no Broadway", do you go to the lame Nutcracker ballet at the state with the low end ballet and inform them that they are "No Bolshoi", do you remind the kids playing little league baseball that they are "No New York Yankees". Listen you live in a crummy midwest town and we got people doing the best they can in the local scene.  Live with it.

Bryan Dubois

Kimo, good point.  I added it.

SR Watcher, anonymity is great isn't it?

Next Regurgitator article:  Top Ten Events SR Watcher Observes So He Can Pretentiously Insult Them:

10.  Little League Baseball  "Your kids ain't no New York Yankees."

9.  Perkins High school musical:  "Your kids ain't Broadway"

8.   State Theatre ballet:  "This ain't no Bolshoi"



SR should go find the article the print edition had about those 11 kids at  Danbury High who have to play every down both sides of the ball so they can have a football team, what those kids need to be told, of course by an anonymous person, is "You punks ain't no Atlanta Falcons"

Return of Dragon

Pastor Ron ain't no Billy Graham

brutus smith

moonbeam, you must be bryan's relative.


Pastor Ron is a Fred Phelps though

Just Asking


Thanks for pointing out that some of us do 'get it'.  At least I understand your articles.  Can't say the same for Don Lee's cartoons.

FYI - If you check the ORC's definition of a meeting - it is 'PRE-PLANNED. 

So TECHNICALLY a chance meeting at Toys R Us (or Teddy Wears) or wherever would not be a violation.

Were the Trustees wrong?  I don't think they were as wrong as there was misunderstanding as to who was to notify the press.  Since they had it right before a pre-planned, announced meeting, did they really have to give additional notification?  I don't know. 

Normally they would announced that they were going into executive session after a meeting.  But as I listened to the audio, Ferrell explained that it was an emergency that legal counsel had to deal with by Wednesday morning and couldn't meet after the meeting.  Stuff happens and not always according to everybody else's (the Register's) time table. 

Could they have waited until 4 to start the meeting?  I suppose so and made the people wait.  My bet is that is what will happen the next time if this ever happens again.     

Like I said before I just wish that the SR (WESTERHOLD) would have been so diligent in protecting the public from the wrong doings of the politicians when ''the best cop ever" (Matt's term for his buddy) was around.  Maybe then some of those IMO "secret" dealings would not have happened.  When are we ever going to find out what it going on in that case? 

6079 Smith W
@ Mr. Dubois:   Shouldn't the word "Regurgitator" used in the title be a tip-off that it ain't to be taken seriously?   Based on the gullibility of some of the commenters, it would appear that the area is perhaps slowly devolving into a local form of “Idiocracy?”

 Don't sell yourself short, you may be one of the smartest people left in the area. But hey! As long as you're enjoying yourself - what the @#$%!


Captain Gutz

I don't know, it all sounds like a lot of Bolshoi to me.

Raoul Duke

I am personally offended by the use of the word "Regurgitator."

Julie R.

Hey Dubois, why don't you do some satire on some of the duh jokes that call themselves judges and prosecutors in corrupt Eeeerie County?

brutus smith

 I think he, well Elsebeth, got in trouble the last time he did that.