Sagging pants and gangster wannabes

I think people have stopped reading my blog. This slightly bothers me. I mean why am I writing if no one is reading, right? I’m not sure. Well, maybe somewhere in my bottomless pit of a heart I still have slight hope for the tactless society I live in. Perhaps I should stop censoring myself.  I should write with more raw emotion. So, here are some of my observations of the world around me, that have had me biting my tongue for the longest time.

text-autospace:none">First, to every male human being who thinks that it is cool to sag your pants down below your rear: PULL UP YOUR FREAKING PANTS! No one cares what color your boxers are, I promise. I also bet that you will get to your destination a lot faster if you’re not traveling at the speed of molasses in January. Trust me, my jeans sit on my hips, and I can walk because I don’t have to hold up my pants to take a step. Isn’t that marvelous? Try it out, it might work for you.

text-autospace:none">Second, I would like to take a moment and ask every person reading this to take a look outside. Do you see the drug-ridden streets of Detroit? What about Chicago, or Los Angeles? No, you don’t. What you see is Sandusky, Ohio. Yes, it may not exactly be the cleanest place to live, but it’s definitely not the ghetto. So, will every ignorant teenage (or should I say child?) please just stop make-believing that you’re a hardened gang banger? On a serious note, if your mommy still buys you clothes, you’re not a “thug.” Stop flashing gang symbols and “representing for the hood.” If you honestly had to live one day in the life of someone who is surrounded by gang violence, you’d come running home crying. In short, stop being a poser.

text-autospace:none">To every driver who takes the time to park their vehicle oh-so-nicely across several parking spaces, you should have your license taken away. Yes, I may only be in the process of earning mine, but I know enough that you have to be able to park properly in order to get that state official card that allows you to legally operate a motorized vehicle. Am I right? So next time you feel the need to not park in those nice yellow lines they draw out for people like you (who obviously don’t know how to park), think about how much of an ignorant idiot you make yourself out to be when others see your dandy parking job.

Yes, this might be an angry rant, but you know that I’m right.