OFFBEAT: Better, mom?

So, I've been wearing black mascara for the past week .... for my mom. It's not in honor of the upcoming Mother's Day
Sandusky Register Staff
May 24, 2010


So, I've been wearing black mascara for the past week .... for my mom.

It's not in honor of the upcoming Mother's Day holiday either.

It's a spell or something.

Maybe a need to get her approval.

Or it could be that mother really does know best.

The mother-daughter relationship is special.

Kind of funny.

Sometimes annoying.

Mostly good in a raw, honest way.

I wasn't feeling so well last week and people started noticing. Kind of drawn, kind of pale, kind of scrubby.

I told my mom about how I was looking and she was concerned and sympathetic, of course.

Later that day, she left me a phone message.

She had a great idea: dark black mascara.

That's right.

She leaves this message about how Oprah says black mascara looks good on almost anyone.

It brightens your eyes and gives new life to your face.

I had to laugh. Not because it wasn't a good idea, but because two weekends ago I was with my mom and I was experimenting with wearing brown mascara.

I guess she didn't like it.

That's my mom for you, though.

Probably your mom, too. I hope so for your sake.

My mom will always tell me the truth even if she does it in a subliminal way; through a gift; dropping a hint; or one week later by turning my illness into a mascara makeover.

My mom is so good she does it in a way that makes it seem helpful and not critical.

It's hard for me to get mad.

One time my mom bought me new bathroom towels after visiting my apartment for a weekend.

I was initially thankful and then I was like, "What's wrong with the ones I have?"

She just smiled.

OK, I get it. They were kind of worn.

Another time, when I was laid up after surgery on my eyes, my mom piled up a bunch of old vases, drinking mugs and stuff that should be recycled or donated.

When I could see again, she told me she was trying to help.

What she really meant was I needed to get rid of the clutter.

More recently it was brown mascara.

Wouldn't you know the very next day I was digging for the black mascara in my makeup bag?

I think it's a skill my mom has mastered over time.

I've gotten a little ticked over these loving suggestions, however, I always find myself coming back to her advice.

Don't wear your hair too short.

Too long and it loses its body.

Not too blonde, baby.

But it's not all about fashion, believe me. My mom has taught me a lot about being beautiful inside.

Thank you notes always.

Kill them with kindness.

Stand up for injustices.

Don't curse.

You can do it.

Just buy it.

But save, too.

Don't be jealous; pray if you are.

Love deeply.

Be sympathetic.

Admit your faults.

Always try to get better.

Women rule, at least in our house.

Forgive even when it seems impossible.


Did you write that thank you note yet?


Try, try and try again. After that, don't be afraid to quit and find what you are really good at. Remember cheerleading, jazz and ballet, mom?

Be your best self, not just yourself.

Love your sisters.

Thank your dad.

Take one for the team.

Be your own team.

There must be a reason.

Come home for Mother's Day.

I am, mom ... in a few days.