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Hoefert’s Academy Awards present...The Obamas

Register • Feb 26, 2014 at 1:20 PM

It’s Oscar week, which culminates this Sunday at the Dolby Theater in Los Angeles when members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences “acting” like our elected officials in Washington ignore the voices of their constituents.

How else can you explain only one of the top ten money makers (Gravity) at the box office being nominated for Best Picture?

That’s right. The lobbyists of Hollywood have wined and dined members of the Academy to nominate films that they want in the running rather than the box office smashes the movie-going public has flocked to watch.

That explains why none of the Minions have ever been nominated.

Speaking of Minions, President Obama had some film-milar moments last year that resembled films from the past, so without further ado “The Obamas”

Oops! Further ado, Part 1 — The Obama Statuette, instead of holding a crusaders sword and standing on a film reel like the Oscar Statuette, will be a statue of President Obama standing over the U.S. Constitution holding an eraser.

Oops! Further ado, Part II — The reason only five from last year are nominated is if they were all nominated it would knock Kathy Lilje’s “and another thing” column off the back page of the B section, and the last thing Mrs. Lilje needs is a C section column.

1. “The Forgotten”

The IRS scandal where the Treasury Inspector General for Tax Administration notified the White House counsel’s office on April 22 that it had completed a review of the IRS office in Cincinnati along with other offices that used inappropriate criteria toidentify potential political cases including tax-exempt organizations with Tea Party in their names.

Three weeks later, President Obama stated at a Monday news conference, on May 13 that:

“I first learned about it from the same news reports that I think most people learned about it. I think it was on Friday”

2. “Gone With The Wind”

Four years after President Obama committed $700 billion of taxpayer money in our nation’s largest bailout of Wall Street the nation’s biggest bank, J.P. Morgan, agreed Nov. 19 to pay a record $13 billion penalty to settle civil claims from state and federal authorities that it sold mortgage backed bonds based on loans that were weaker than advertised.

Avoiding prison, yes, the J.P. Morgan execs actions would have landed you and me in the pokey, J.P. Morgan more than likely paid the record fine using the bailout money taxpayers gave them and “Frankly my dears, they didn’t give a damn”

3. “Requiem for a Dream”

On Oct. 1 President Obama decided to start the Affordable Care Act online before hundreds of technical problems had been worked out. President Obama insisted over and over he never would have allowed the rollout to proceed if he had known how bad the problems were.

However, yes there’s always a however.

However, Congressional testimony confirmed the White House was informed of the problems as early as last March.

4. “Liar, Liar”

President Obama’s misleading promise that Americans who liked their existing health insurance could hang onto it when he said over and over:

“If you like your health care plan, you can keep it”

Despite repeated assurances to that effect, more than 4.2 million Americans have seen their health insurance policies canceled because they did not meet the new, higher standards for services required under the Affordable Care Act.

This already has the dubious distinction of being named “Lie of the Year” by Politifact and definitely ranks right up there with President George H.W. Bush’s 1988 statement of:

“Read my lips: no new taxes”

5. “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”

In late July, Edward Snowden was granted asylum by the Russian government after being charged in the United States with espionage and theft of government property, which prompted President Obama on Aug. 6 to tell Americans:

“We don’t have a domestic spying program” Along with “There is no spying on Americans”

Turns out, thanks to the all the dotted T’s and all the crossed I’s in the loophole of fine print written into The Patriot Act, it is legal to wiretap U.S. citizens. So, under the law of the land, the NSA is not spying.

They’re observing.

Those are the five nominees for The Obamas.

And the winner is….


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