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I cannot not do this

Kristin Gleis • Mar 23, 2010 at 6:27 PM

I once said,” I can't do that.” As I spoke those very words, I was told, “Can't means you won't."

Now, that I am 26 years old and have three children to raise, I preach those same words to them. “Can't means you won't.” I have even gone as far as to tell the girls “can’t” is not a word that should be used in our home.

I find it amusing that I can tell my three children not to use the word “can't,” but I am unable to refrain from speaking that word. There are many times during my workday, I find myself telling a co-worker “I can't do that” or “I can't do this.” When in all reality, I can do this or that, I just choose to be lazy and not do it.

This lazy “I can’t” attitude has recently been brought to my attention. I would like to apologize if I have came across as ungrateful that I was chosen to be a part of this FIT Challenge. I appreciate this wonderful opportunity to share my weight loss struggle with the many of you that read these blogs.

I would like to thank you again for all the positive comments and feedback I have received. When I seem to be negative about my weight loss thus far, I do not mean to come across that way.

I am my own worst enemy, as I am sure most of you are, too. When you are overweight, you are always the hardest on yourself. No one else cares if you eat that cookie or if you eat the candy bar that you swear is calling out to you from the vending machine at work, only you do. You are the only one that is mad at yourself after you ate that cookie; you are the only person saying, “Oh, I should not have done that.”

When I don't see that scale move as much as I want then I am mad at myself. Please don't get me wrong. I am very pleased that I have lost 21 pounds and 19.5 inches. I know many of you reading this would switch with me in a heartbeat to be able to have the chance I have been given.

For the first time I think since the children came to live with me, I surprised them and took them to the park on March 15. The kids were so excited that I was playing with them. I was actually out of the car and on the swings and going down the slides with them. I was so happy and felt so good that I was able to do this. I am finally starting to get the energy to go outside and play with my kids, and that is a feeling, words cannot describe.

“With God, all things are possible.” I also went to church on March 15. I am not the most religious person, but I do believe in God and I do believe that with God on my side I am able to accomplish anything.

Remember that other saying “God does not give us more than we can handle.” I am thankful that God believes in me so much he allowed me this chance to share it with all of you. I am also thankful for Brandi Barhite, without her I would not be writing this blog. She is the editor who picked my essay for the contest. Last, but not least, personal trainer Tyra James. You have taught me so much about myself in just three short months. I can't wait to see what else I learn from you in the months to come. Again, to all you readers, thank you, thank you for all your support.

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